The Attention Deficit Disorder Thread

Bump style

 

Friend : do you lie down on the bed and masturbate or like in the shower?

Me : What?? why do you want to know?

Friend : I'm just curious.

Me : Why???

Friend : I just want to know, like I want to know if Gandhi was homo.

Me : WHAT? he wasn't a homo!

 

Friend : I will kill you one day.

Me : Why???? why me? I'm your only friend!


Friend : that's why!

 

Friend : I will shoot you!

Me : Okay.

Friend : I will shoot you and then write a suicide note in your handwriting.

Me : What will it say?

Friend : It will say "I'm very sorry I can't take it anymore, I am a homosexual and I have homosexual feelings, I can't control myself....and so I am killing myself.....and my friend ******** (friend's name) is not a homosexual at all, not even 1% it's all me, and I can't take the burden anymore so I'm killing myself."

 

is your friend a girl or a boy
cause i think im in love

 

Guy.

 

oh well thats disappointing
when does he plan to kill you, have you set a date?

 

I imagine it will happen in a few years time when he goes insane.....it'll be more that he'll be planning to go out into the streets and shot random people (you know...like those postal workers back in the 80s) and I'll be trying to stop him ad he'll end up taking out all his frustration on me by shooting me a dozen or so times then start beating up my corpse for a while before he breaks down crying.

 

boy havent we all been there!

 

so how is the stalking girls on line going, i would like to think at your age, you should be very skilled at getting the boobies out and on the cam.

 

You would think.....but no.

 

oh. well sorry to hear that. have you tried asking.
a good way is to tell them you need a pick me up. and nothing works better than a photo of there nice tasty breastisis. they will say no way, at first. but then lie and tell them you wont share with me and they will send em im sure
want me to put a note on your fb wall that you need boobies right away?
that may help

 

No thanks.

 

Hi gang.

 

Hi preston
well jack ive been stalking your profile and darn it all there are just some of those girls i would like to see boobies of
what on earth can we do to sort this issue.
come on now, lets pull our talents and see if we cant "crack this nut" so to speak.
thoughts?

 

Hey Grimms. How you?

 

im working right now. will be for another 50 min, dont think i can get everything done but im trying
how about you?

oh and im trying to help jack see boobies.
i think he is shy

 

I've been good. You know how it is. Trying to stalk a woman and keep your fiancée happy while working 20 hrs. every 2 weeks can tale a lot out of you.

 

Why don't we focus on people who aren't my friends.

 

Hi Del.